Hot Takes from a Photographer
By Jessica Wenzel, Jessica Erin Photos
You just got engaged! Woohoo! Now cue the sudden landslide of ideas, choices, expectations, and every emotion in between. Ready to just go to the courthouse yet?
You’re torn between wanting to stay present but still daydreaming about the perfect wedding day. You want to keep the main thing the main thing, but there are so many cool ways to make a wedding sparkle and show off the personality of your story and love. The process can feel like a blissful overwhelm, or it can just feel like a major burden.
After photographing almost 100 weddings, here are a few points that always ring true, even if they break tradition or step on some toes!
1. See Your Partner in the Morning
The wedding day starts the second the clock strikes midnight, not when hair and makeup are finished. Why not spend those first hours together? Grab a cup of coffee, go for a morning walk, or share a quiet breakfast before the whirlwind begins. The best part of the day will always be the two of you – so starting the day side by side sets the tone for everything that follows. Instead of only waiting until the hustle and bustle gets started to see each other, you’re already connected, grounded, and soaking in the joy of what’s ahead.
2. Skip the Favors
Here’s the truth: most wedding favors end up forgotten on tables or tossed into a drawer. Unless you’re gifting chocolate or sending guests’ home with a keepsake photo, let this tradition go. Budget for something more meaningful – like an incredible meal, a late-night snack bar, or a champagne tower. Don’t try to impress anyone with trinkets. They’ll remember how you made them feel.
3. Spend What Feels Right
There’s no magic number for what a wedding should cost, because every couple is different. Maybe you dream of an intimate backyard celebration with fairy lights and pizza, or a black-tie weekend getaway. Both are equally valid. Weddings are an art form, and every detail is an opportunity for expression. The most important thing? Spend in a way that reflects your priorities and brings joy, not in a way that checks boxes for someone else’s expectations.
5. Details Matter (But They Should Feel Like You)
The details: the venue, florals, table settings – aren’t just decorations. They set the tone of the day and become part of the story. They’ll be woven into photos, and those photos will remind you of how the day felt. The key isn’t to stress about having perfect details, but to make them personal. Incorporate a family heirloom, a handwritten note, or a favorite song lyric. Details matter when they reflect you.
6. Hire a Planner
This might be the most important piece of advice: hire a planner. Seriously. A wedding planner or day-of coordinator doesn’t just keep the train running on time – they free you and loved ones up to enjoy the day. Mom won’t be the one worrying about candles, timelines, or shuttle buses. The bridal party won’t be checking in on catering. Your brother won’t be running around trying to move decor. Laugh with your friends, hold your partner’s hand, and live fully in the moment. Trust us on this one – it’s worth every penny.
7. Plan an Experience, Not a Shot List
Pinterest is great for inspiration, but your wedding isn’t a styled shoot – it’s real life. Instead of handing the photographer a rigid shot list, think about the experiences you want to have. Do you want to pop champagne with your best friends? Share a private dance under the stars? Have a mini cocktail hour with your bridal party instead of dozens of basic group photos? Photos will flow naturally out of those lived moments, and they’ll feel infinitely more authentic than a checklist ever could.
The Heart of It All
At the end of the day, your wedding is a once-in-a-lifetime celebration of love. The choices made, big or small, should always reflect what feels true to you. The most memorable days are the ones where couples are fully themselves.
So, take the walk together in the morning. Skip the favors. Spend in a way that feels right. Focus on your marriage. Add meaningful details. Hire the planner. Live your moments fully. And above all, remember that this day is about celebrating your love story and those who supported you along the way.
Jessica is a documentary-style photographer capturing love stories with joy and artistry on digital and 35mm film. She’s known for helping couples who feel awkward in front of the camera relax and have fun, creating an enjoyable experience and timeless photographs that beautifully preserve their love for generations. Visit jessicaerinphotos.com for more info.
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